Grounded but not Rooted - Free but not lost

Lately, I have observed myself struggling and losing my ground. Unbalancing myself with a head that wants to figure out what to do, a body that continues to send messages of desperate need for balance and a heart that is trying to stay calm.

Sometimes we chose a destination that takes us not on another path. That's so classic. And suddenly the destination becomes secondary. Suddenly this destination choses that path for us. We though we were choosing all along but instead life took us to where we needed to be. Not where we wanted to be. Like invisible arms carrying us towards that path.

All along, I am struggling, resisting, wanting something else than what is actually happening. I am blind, I resist... WTF...  I suffer,

And suddenly I understand and it makes me cry. I surrender. I understand and I am grateful.

I think about these people who don't have the choice of their actual destination, who are relocated by force. They adapt, they experience resilience, stay low, stay humble. Almost apologizing for the oxygen they breathe. I think about these people as I am settling back in France for a while. I feel ungrounded as I look at my roots. I am lost while having full freedom.

I have chosen that nomadic life. I have chosen to take my roots off, I have my practices to find my feet and my ground regardless of where I am.

I have these lungs to breathe. I am ok.

This morning, I opened Shambhala, The Sacred Path of the Warrior by Chögyam Trungpa and I remembered to connect to my Basic Goodness: '' When you don't punish or condemn yourself, when you relax more and appreciate your body and your mind, you begin to contact the fundamental notion of basic goodness in yourself. So it is extremely important to be willing to open yourself to yourself. Developing tenderness towards yourself allows you to see both your problems and your potential accurately, You don't feel that you have to ignore your problems or exaggerate your potential. That kind of gentleness towards yourself and appreciation of yourself is very necessary. It provides the ground for helping yourself and others."

Namaste, Sukseme, Aho

Dancing, moving, staying grounded but not rooted